searching
by bloodhoney
Summary: bella swan isn't a normal vamp she's whats called an ageless inheritor, she moves to forks in search of her mother Renee Hayden and what will she think of a certin covern of vamps that call themselves a family and what will she think of a certin edward.
1. Chapter 1

**Searching **

**Chapter 1: legends**

There's a legend, whether it's true or not, it's hard to say, you know how these things go, stories being past down from generation to generation always changing. There's a house set back far in the woods where people rarely venture, It can't really be classed as a house it's more of a castle, with huge towers that have gargoyles looking down at the huge garden, the brick walls and the huge iron gates that surround it almost protectively. If you wonder into the woods and are lucky enough not to get lost and stumble upon manor Hayden, it was made after the man who made it, he was a snobby man who grew crippled with old age, he used to have grand balls and invite the whole village, but then as he grew older he started to distance himself, the legends say that he was some sort of scientist, that he was doing an experiment that went horribly wrong, , he grew terrifyingly ugly and his attitude grew monstrous, he had a wife and a daughter, when his daughter died at 17 his wife couldn't bare the sorrow and the constant reminders of René, so soon after her death she attached a noose to one of the great willow trees and hung herself, the legend goes that on a full moon if you listen hard enough you can hear her cry's hallowing in the wind, But she's still alive and the legends are true, they just have a bit of a twist to them, my name is Bella, René was my mother, how you ask when she died at such a young age, well she didn't die not really, in a sense she is dead, she's part of the undead, she's a vampire, and I'm a vampire, I know what you're thinking vampire's can't have children, well normal ones can't, we are what are called ageless inheritors, what are they you ask, inheritors are people who have the vampirism past down from generation to generation living up to 400, they can eat food but also require blood, there are some very rare cases where the inheritor comes from a family where neither parents were inheritors, that's what happened to my mother, and ageless vampire's are vampire's that were created or bitten if you like by other vampires, they never grow old from the moment they are bitten, they live for all eternity or till they are killed but the only things that are strong enough to do this are other vampire's and I've also heard rumours of werewolves that are not children of the moon being able to destroy them as well, anyway ageless vampire's require blood human or animal, and they cannot eat human food, the females of this race can't have children, so this all started when a inheritor and an ageless fell in love, and a new race was created called the ageless inheritors, we can live for all eternity, we can eat human food although it makes us sick because our digestive systems can't handle it as well as it can the blood, and we have the same abilities the agelessness have only were stronger and faster.

So now as I make my way to a small town called forks in search of my mother, hoping that the rumours that my father had heard were true, there were rumours floating around the vampire community, that a young women around the age of 17 has been spotted around the area, they say she lives in a small cottage alone far in the woods, attending the only high school within miles of the place, it has about 400 students, racing down the oh so quiet streets of forks to the house that me and my father owned, letting my ,mind wonder over the distant memories of when my father used to sit on my bed as I was drifting off into a light sleep telling my about my other, you could hear the adoration in his voice as he talked about her, her name was René Hayden, my father was Charlie swan, mine Bella swan, he often calls me bells saying my voice sounds like the chimes of church bells when I open my mouth and sing, I was now singing the song that I wrote which reminded me that I didn't have a mother

I'll sing it one last time for you,  
and we really have to go,  
and the only thing that's right,  
in your life time  
and I can barely look at you,  
but every single time I do  
I know I

**she** **made** it anywhere,  
away from here

Light up light up as if you have a choice,  
even if you cannot hear my voice,  
I'll be right beside you dear  
Louder louder an we'll run for our lives,  
I can hardly speak I **don't** understand  
how you **left us**

these are the words she used to sing to me father said I got my singing voice from her

to think I might not see those eyes,  
makes it so hard not to cry  
and as we say our long goodbyes  
I nearly die  
mmmmmmmm

Light up, Light up as if you have a choice  
even if you cannot hear my voice  
I'll be right beside you dear  
lmmmmmm  
louder louder and we'll run for our lives  
I can hardly speak I** don't** understand  
why you **left us**

laaaaalaa haaaaa laahaae oooooooooo

light up light up, as if you have a choice even hear my voice  
I'll be right beside u dear yes I will  
louder louder an we'll run for our lives  
I can hardly speak I understand how u can raise ur voice to say  
ooooooooo mmmmmmmm

farther never told me why she left and i learned not to ask to much as it was ripping his dead unbeating heart into pieces with every word that escaped his mouth.


	2. feeling welcome ha

**Searching**

**Chapter2: Feeling welcome ha**

I drove down the once bricked path that was now covered in moss and wild flowers creating a sort of meddowy effect, the house was beautiful, red brick early Victorian, i could see the broken windows that were sure to be curtosy of stupid hormonal teenagers throwing stones and scareing their girlfriends with ghost stories, i sighed thinking about all the renavateing that i would ahve to do on the oh so beautiful house.

''you wernt kidding when you said it might need some work, were you farther'' i said to nobody in particular.

I pulled up in front of the house , i steped out of my car walking over to the trunk as i unloaded my belonging's i would have left most of this stuff at home, hell i would have left it in the store's if it wasn't for my over joyous cousin alina for forcing her puppy dog eye's on me and insisting that with a whole new town comes a whole new wardrobe, i have about three suite cases just full of shoes, five full of top shirts and dresses and six full of pants skirts, and not to mention all the duffel bags full of acsessories and make up, at this ratei'll have to transform the basement into one huge closet, alina would love that.

It took me half the time i would have to get every thing into the foyer than it would have without my inhuman speed, now i just have to unpack and find places to put every thing, the house was already furnished charlie took care of that before i arrived, so their was no need to go mall hunting for furniture thank god, it's not that i don't like shoping it that i absolutely dispise it.**(i'm sorry if you love shoping believe me when i say this it is one of my fav activities, plz don't shoot me lol)**.

When i had unpacked everything i went round the house and borded up the broken windows with planks of ply wood i found in the basement that was now my closet, i'd have to tell alina about this she'd just love it, her closet is huge but mine is a house compered to her's i seriously think it sould bow down in shame and hand the crown over to mine for the queen of big closets.

I'd just finished boarding up the last window when i looked at my watch, ''shoot'' i muttered to myself, i only had an hour to get ready, i quickly ran into my bathroom and jumped into the showter, is sware it was the quickest shower in the history of quick showers, i was in there all of 5 muinites, i jumped out and into my room where i had a small supply of chlothes in the small walkin closet, i put on a long sleved white t-shirt, a blue waistcoat cardigan, with black and white bead belts, black skiny jeans, and my favourite black leather stiletto boots, I walked down stairs grabbing my keys of the table near the door and speeding to school in my midnight blue Porsche.

The parkinglot was empty i was 20 muinites early for school, i got out of my car with a sigh and walked over to a small square building that was labled office, to tell you the truth it looked more like a prison, i walked through the black rimmed double doors an dwalked up to the receptionist, she was a small women, late forties, she had cropped graying blond hair that ened just below her chin, she had round glasses **(abit like harry potters)** that were sliding down her thin nose, she haddent noticed me yet and any muinite i half expected her to look up and jump a foot in the air and to see thoses glasses fly off her face never to be seen again, just like it should be.

I tapped on the glass pain that separated her from the rest of the world**(haha she's a prisoner in her own cubical lol)** as i expected she jumped out of her seat at the sound of my tapping and away went her glasses although they didn't get lost just unfortanatly for her they fell in to the fish tank behind her that housesd some very hungry looking fish.

''oh, sorry about that dear, how may i help you''she said with a bright smile now that i could see her face properly could see that she had a kind face and eyes that sparkeled with happiness, she was one of those people where you could see that they were stunning when they were your age.

''no worries, i'm Isabella swan, i was told you were expecting me'' i replied with a smile.

''oh yes ofcorse dear, just let me get your scedual'' she got up and stared to rustle through a pile of papers on a desck behind her.

''ah, here you are dear'' she said handing me my schedual along with two other slips of paper.

''that's your scedual, a map of the school, and a slip for the teachers to sign and for you to bring back at the end of the day'' she explained.

''bye, and thank you''

''yes yes, bye now dear''

I still had fifteen muinites left beforeclass started so i went to sit on a bench near my fist period, i sat down and pulled out my ipod from my bag, i turned it on and my immortal came on, for my last birthday charlie had got me the ipod, and alina had secretly recored my voice and uploaded it to the ipod , i was listening to a song i wrote about what i could remember of my mother.

**(i have not made this song up but the lyrics i have changed are in bold)**

I'm so tired of being here  
Suppressed by all my childish fears  
And if you have to leave  
I wish that **you would take me to**  
'Cause your presence still lingers here  
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal  
This pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When **i** cried **you'd** wipe away all of **my** tears  
When **i** **screamed** **you'd** fight away all of **my** fears  
And **you** held **my** hand through all of these years  
But you still have  
All of me

You used to captivate me  
By your resonating life  
Now I'm bound by the life you've left behind  
Your face it haunts  
My once pleasant dreams  
Your voice it chased away  
All the sanity in me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone  
But though you're still with me  
I've been alone all along.

I hadn't realised i was singing until i looked up to the now full school grounds to see all the students gawping at me, oh great what a way to blend in just great bella, i quickly got up pocketing my ipod as i made my way to my first lesson, my first class was lit with mrs Peterson, her lesson was lick an over grown wart unnessasery and annoying and just plain pointless, i've been through the same things over s hundred times and could probably teach it better than her well their was no probably about it i could, how could anyone stand her lesson.

I was falling asleep and thats quite hard to do considering when i reached the age eighteen i could only sleep when my body was so weak i would callapse from exhaustion, well ok i csnt really sleep lets just put it this way i was so so so BORED...

I was looking at my schedual, to see what i've got next then i felt someone tap me on my shoulder, eh personal space much, i thought as i turned round to see a boy about my age with spiked up blonde hair.

''hi, i'm mike newton, you must be the new girl isabella'' he said, i could tell he was thinking inappropriate things about me, by the dirty smile that was plastered on his face.

'' it's bella''

''so anyway bella, how about i show you round the school'' he snaked his arm round my shoulders i thought the erge to shake him off punch him in the gut and call him a pervert.

'' no thats ok, i'll be fine'' i stepped out of his arms and headed out the door, he was rushing to keep up with my slightly too fast pace, slow it down i thought to myself no matter how much i dispice this perverted human i can not be exposed.

''so what you got now'' he asked hopeful god this overobsesive puppy was starting to get on my last nerve.

''Trig''

''hey i have that class to, it must be fate'' oh just great, not only is he a pervert he is one that thinks he's charming, can my day get any worse? He snaked his arm around my waiste and drgged me off in the dirction of our next class, apparently it can get worse much worse.

Apart from that vile mike newton my day was suppriseingly ok, i meet a nice shy girl named Angela, and a girl called Jessica, who was aa bit vain and full of herself, and i had a feeling that she was only nice to me because i was the intresting new meat so to speak.

After indureing trig with mike, i had Spanish, i sat next to Angela, i did'nt really pay attention to the teacher afterall i was more fluent in Spanish than she was, haveing lived there for fifty or so years, after Spanish it was lunch, i lined up to waste money on food that i wouldn't even eat and found an empty table near the back entrence so i could get out if i wished.

Lunch was almost unbareable, mike and his little possie as i've come to think of them invaded my peace and quite, i felt my self loseing my cool with their constent bickering and nonsence, i forced my self to laugh at their pathetic jokes, when they called on me and waited for my responce.

Mike was trying to impress me with something unimportant when i saw them, i'd been expecting to find my mother here but what i got was so much more, their was five of them, all as gracefull and beautiful as each other, they all seemed to be together, the tall model like blonde, and the big curly haired one who looked like a big teddy bear, the short pixie like girl with short black spiky hair, and the blond male who's face was a picture of pain and astonishment, but one caught my eye more than the other's he seemed to be alone, he walked in after them with a slight grimce on his face like he was unhappy about something, he was an angle he had to be he was hevenly beautiful, with his gold eye's tall muscular lean body, and his strange copper coloured toseled hair, he was the picture of perfect.


	3. picture of perfect

**Searching**

**Chapter3: picture of perfect**

i had totaly forgot that i had a table full of people siting with me, i was too busy gawping at him, i could hear angela'a sweet voice calling my name in the distance, slowly comeing closer to me snapping me out of my hazy world.

''bella, bella can you hear me, bella'' she was shaking me know and quit viontly may i add, i snappe out of it and gave her an apologetic smile.

''sorry angela, of in my own little world for a moment there''

''yeah, like fantisizeing bout cullen'' Jessica muttered under her breath, thinking i couldn't hear her.

''who are they'' i asked no one in particular, still stareing after the beautiful bronze haired angle, i saw them all turn to look in the direction that i was looking, when they saw who i was looking at most of them turned away ducking their head's, but angela and Jessica continued looking for a second longer then answered my question.

''their the cullens, the small one with short spiky hair is alice Cullen, the one next to her is her boy friend jasper hale. Said Jessica

'' and the tall blonde, and the big curly haired one are Rosalie hale and emmet Cullen her boyfriend'' said angela, were they going to take it in turns and introduce them.

''and he's Edward Cullen, he's gorgeous, but apparently no one heres good enough for him'' apparently they were.

''oh'' was all i said then i turned back round in my seat and staired at the untouched pasta that lay infront of me, i grabed my apple by it's stork and begun twirling it around.

I got out of my seat saying that i left something in my car and i'd see them in gym, i walked out the back doors and round the corner of the cafeteria, i sat down on a bench that was rested beneath a tree, i fished my ipod out of my bag and started to sing along to one of the first songs i wrote, its called same mistake.

**So i'm turning in my sheets and once again i cannot sleep, walk out the door and down the street look at the stars beneath my feet, rememerise what i did wrong, so here i go hello hello there is no place i cannot go, my mind is not enough my heart is heavy dose it show, i lose the track that loses me, so here i go, and so i sent some men to fight and one came back at dead of night said he'd seen my inner me said he looked just like me, so i set out to cut myself, and here i go, i'm not calling for a second chance i'm screaming at the top of my voice give me reason but don't dive me choice, coz i'll jsut make the same mistake again, and maybe someday we will meet and maybe talk and not just speak don't buy the promises coz their are no promises i keep, and my reflection troubles me so here i go, im not calling for a second chance, i'm screaming at the top of my voice, give me reason but don't give me choice coz i'll just make the same mistake again, i'm not calling for a second chance i'm screaming at the top of my voice, give me reason but don't give me chice coz i'll just make the same mistake, im not calling foor a second choice, i'm screaming at the top of my voice give me reason but don't give me choice coz i'll just make the same mistake again, so while im turning in my sheets and once again i cannot sleep walk out the door and up the street look at the stars beneath my feet starts fall down and wander where did i go wrong.**

''your a really good singer'' said a smooth almost velvety voice, i looked up to see Edward standing infront of me with a heart breacking crooked smile on his face,

''thanks, i'm bella''

''hello bella, i'm Edward cullen'' he held out his hand towards me and i took it gladly, he shook my hand and then pulled me up of the bench, he looked at the confused expression on my face and laughed.

''your gonna be late if you continue to sit here much longer'' he said still laughing.

''oh, er thanks''

''no problem, so what lesson have you got know'' i took my schedual out of my bag, i had biology with mr banner, oh joy, just yet another lesson that i had to learn for the hundredth time.

''biology with mr banner'' when i said this his smile grew bigger.

''well, well look's like we have the same lesson why don't i escort you miss swan'' he held out his arm for me to loop mine around his, i did ignoring that he knew my last name when i hadn't even told him, well he is a vampire you imbecile, the voice in my head screamed.

''why not Mr Cullen''

When we got to class he let go of my arm and went and sat down at the back off the class room, i looked up and saw that the only empty seat was next to Edward, this should be fun, time to tease the vampire.

''hello sir my name is Isabella swan''

''ah ofcorse, we've been expecting you miss swan'' he said looking up from the papers on his desk.

''why don't you introduce yourself dear'' oh great just what i was hopeing for not, what was i ment to say, hey im an ageless inheritor, i lived with my vampire dad and cousin, until i came here looking for my mother, who left us when i was five and that was hundereds of years ago, and if you call me Isabella, izzy or izzybell i may have to rip your throats out and that would ruine my oh so speciel diet now wouldn't it, _**ofcorse your not, silly izzy**_, wait what that was alina, what was she doing here, _Alina what are you doing here, __**oh i missed you silly so charlie sent me here insted of me mopeing around the house, do you know how long i've not been shoping for, a week, i mean come on a week izzybel. **__wow where are you know, you should get rejistered, i'm sufficateing here on my own.__** Already way ahead of you little sis by now, oh and izzy, were going shopping after school.**_ Oh great, i already have way too much clothes, we call our selves sisters coz in truth we are just like sisters, we look the same except for her goldern hair that matches her golden eye's, we are the same age really, but in reality she is fifty years older than me, she was 17 when she was changed, and i stopped ageing when i reached 17, so we oftern possed as twins, i guess i need to introduce myself know then.

''hey everyone, i'm Isabella, but most people call me bella, theres not really much to say, i live with my farther charlie and my twin sister Aliana, she will be comeing a bit later, because i was the first to arrive, she should be here-''

''round bout know'' said alaina's bubbly energetic voice as she opened the door, ''hi every one as my sister just said, i'm Alaina'' she said with a bright smile

I turned to mr banner and asked if we could take a seat know he just nodded his head and pointed to the two seats next to Edward, huh i could have sweared ther was only one, oh well, i linked arms with Alaina and walked over, we sat down, alaina was bouncing up and down and giggeling for some reason.

''hi Edward this is my sister, Alina''

''hello Alina, i'm Edward cullen''

''oh i know'' she giggled shaking his hand, _Alina either he's just dumb, or he's being nice_ at not mentioning the he knows were vampire's i mean he's touched us both, _**oh he know's little izzybell,but he dosn't know we know, what do you say to toying with dear little Edward here. **__Oh i say lets do it!_


	4. giddy little devils

_**Searching**_

_**Chapter4: giggiling devils**_

**I know their vampires, yet bella seems to be quite different, her sent, her eyes, her attitude, but then there's her sister Alina, she's normal, well not exactly normal, what i mean is she's like us veggie vamps, but her sister, she's a vampire all right, but she's something else.**

''**so Edward, seen any vampire movies lately'' said bella a slight smile playing on her features, i froze, they didn't know what i was did they, Alina maybe, but i didn't even know if bella was a vampire.**

''**no i can't say i have, how bout you'' i said trying to keep my cool.**

''**oh yes we've just recently seen one about, gold eyed vampires who eat animals insted of humans, isn't that right bella'' said Alina, you know she really reminds me of Alice, bubbly energetic and oh so giddy.**

''**yes, it was rather- imformative'' giggled bella, oh god she had the laughter of bells and the voice that put church bells to shame, her name really did her jusitas, she was beautiful, and she sounded like bells **

**When i didn't say anything, they continued to laugh uncontroably, clutching at their stomachs nearly falling off their chairs, they came back to reality when mr banner coughed and splutterd everywhere, they got paniced expressions on their faces.**

''**erm, mr banner, sir, is it alright if i take bella to the nurses office she dosn't feel so well sir'' asked Alina, worry clear on her face.**

''**yes, yehes go ahead'' replyed mr banner coughing again, Alina grabbed bella and nearly ran out the room, huh i wonder what that was all about, i wander why the two little giggleing devils ran out of class because mr banner caoughed.**


	5. my weakness is my illness

**Searching**

**Chapter5: my weakness is illness**

**apov**

_this is bad i have to get her out, charlie had been reaserching why sick humans effect her so for centuries, but no matter where he looked or how hard he tried, his daughter was the only one they seemed to effect, if a human had so much as a cough or a cold she would get sick, very sick and the only thing that seemed to help was hunting, and not our usual diet she had to have human blood, and i only happened to leave our only supply with charlie._

''_bells, come on stay with me'' i could see her drifting her eyes were closeing, To anyone who knew any better she would look like she was falling asleep, but i knew better bella haddn't slept a wink since her eighteenth birthday._

_Once we were out of sight i gathered her up in my arms and ran to her Audi, i placed her in the back and sped of down the highway, i pulled up at our old house and ran her inside, placing bella on the soft black velvet counch i ran to phone charlie._

''_hello, swan residence, Charlie speaking'' he answered on the first ring_

''_oh thank god charlie, it's alina, bella needs blood, our teacher was ill''_

''_what is she alright'' i could hear the worrie clear in his voice._

''_charlie, ileftthebloodwithyourememberandknowingbellshe'llrefusetohunt''_

''_okay, alina clam down and take a breath, call the hospital and ask for dr carlise Cullen, he's an old friend of mine, tell him your my neice and that my daughter needs his help he should remember her and her condition''_

_i called the number for the hospital that charlie gave me, and the reseoptionist put me through to carlise._

''_hello, dr carlise Cullen how may i be of service''_

''_oh thank god carlise''_

''_sorry who is this may i ask''_

''_alina swan, charlie swans neice, do you remember his daughter bella''_

''_oh well ofcorse i remember that clumsy bundle of joy, how are they''_

''_charlie's fine but bella's not doin so well she needs blood can you help her please, or she'll die''_

''_i'll be right there, i assume your at your old house''_

''_yes, and thankyou''_


	6. deathly daughter

**Searching**

**Chapter6:deathly daughter**

**Cpov**

**I was sorting through paper work in my office, when one of the many flirtatious receptionists knocked on my door.**

''**enter'' i looked up from my sheet filled desk to the red haired girl standing in front of me twideling her thumbs, she was quite a small girl not very old maybe twenty or so, she had bright blue eyes that were framed by cute freckles, i looked at the identification tag that she wore and saw her name was, Kimberly-anne scottersdale.**

''**how may i help you Kimberly-anne'' i said flashing her what i hoped was a kind smile.**

''**erm, well, their was a phone call for you'' she stared at the shones still twiderling her thumbs, maybe i was to jugmentel, she didn't seem flirtatious infact she seemed rather shy.**

''**yes, who was calling''**

''**she said her name was alina, she's on line one'' and with that she rushed out of my office, i sighed as i looked back at my desk, i gathered the papers up into a pile pressing the one button on the phone.**

''**hello Dr Carlise Cullen, how may i be of service'' i said anwnsering the phone**

''**oh thank god carlise'' said i slightly hiper voice on the other end**

''**sorry who is this may i ask'' i was getting slightly confused here i don't know this hiper girl yet she seems to know me.**

''**alina swan, charlie swans neice, do you remember his daughter bella'' oh ofcorse i remember charlie saying that he had to change his necice, her parents were murdered and she was on the brink of death, and he couldn't bare to lose her, she was the only tie he had left to his human life, her parents though him dead and bella wasn't even human she was a frail little lonely girl.**

''**oh well ofcorse i remember that clumsy bundle of joy, how are they''**

''**charlie's fine but bella's not doin so well she needs blood can you help her please, or she'll die'' oh no, last time this happened i was barely able to save her in time, she needed blood and she needed it know.**

''**i'll be right there, i assume your at your old house''**

''**yes, and thankyou'' with that i hung up the phone and headed to the mourge.**

''**do you have any blood'' i asked dr Francis.**

'' **not on hand but i could order some from the blood bank if you wish''**

''**no that's quite alright'' it was not quite alright, bella needed blood i ran back to my office a bit to fast for a human and grabbed my bag, i pulled out my cell phone dailing esmes number, she answered on the first tone.**

''**hello carlise dear can i help you with anything'' she asked in her kind motherly voice**

''**yes could you please go down to the cellar and see if we have any human blood left and if its drinkable''**

''**sure but why do you ask''**

''**no time please just hurry up esme'' i hured shuffeling on the other end as she made her way down to the cellar**

''**yes their is four poches, what do you need them for love''**

'' **no time to explaine just please have my medical equipment set up please i love you my darling esme''**

''**okay, i love you too carlise**

**I rushed out of the hospital, when i got to my car i gunned it, i sped as fast as my car could tolerate, i had never driven this fast and recklessly in my existence, i pulled up onto the long drive that led to their house when i pulled up is saw girl that i assumed must be alina paceing the front porch franticly, I got out of my car and ran to her.**

''**quickly, get bella in my car'' she didn't say anything she just nodded.**

**Once we were in my car i sped in the direction of my house, all the while looking back at bellas face that was growing whiter and whiter by the second, she was already white before but know her skin was transparent it looked hallow almost, if she didn't get blood fast she was going to die, i couldn't let her slip away she is my best friends daughter, she is like a daughter to me, a deathly daughter, a daughter that could die in the blink of the eye from a cold.**

**I stoped infront of my house not bothering to park in the gararge their was no time, I got out of the car and gathred her in to my arms running into the house, in the living room where esmes antique dinning table used to be now stood my leather patient bed, I placed bella on it and set to work, I heard esme gasp as she realize how this sickly child was.**

''**oh my lord, please say she isn't sweet little bella swan''**

''**I'm afraid so mrs Cullen, im her cousin alina'' she said in bared between tearless sobs**

''**oh dear, what a hard ship this must be on you, come lets leave carlise to treat her in peace''**

**In a way I was glad that they were gone I had to have my mind fully concentrated on cureing bella.**

**I placed the blood in a bottle an placed it at her barely visable lips, her skin started to regain some off its colouer as she tookin the blood, blood stared to ooze out of her tear ducts, he nose and ears, and I kne wit was working the first time this had happened it had sceared the living daylights out of her farther and I, we ahd though it was making her even worse but then she started to regain her clolouer her skin was even slightly flushed. But I know know that the human blood has to flush out all the animal blood in her in order to do its job properly, so it leaves in the only place possible her eyes nose and ears.**

''**oh my god, whats happened to her carlise'' I was that deep in thought I haddnet even heared alina enter the room.**

''**nothing, nothing she is perfectly fine, this is just part of the prosess, her body needs to be full with human blood and this is the only way of getting rid of the animal blood, now I think we should let her rest''**

**I gathered her up into my arms and ran her up to the top floor, I opened the guestroom door and places her in the bed, she wouldn't normaly sleep but this would knock her out for days she shouls be awake by the end of the week.**

**I closed the door behind me leaving her alone in the pieace and quite of her small little sanctuary**

**An**

**If you don't know what I mean my sanctuary, carlise is calling it that because none of them can sleep but if bella gets ill or is really exhausted, her body goes into a shut down like state which is kinda like she is sleeping, so what do you think love it hate it I don't care just please review or I'm gonna hold this story hostage and ask for a ridiculously high review as my ransom lol.**

**Any ideas are welcome, infact I'd get down on my knees and beg for then, this isme begging so please give me some ideas, if you want me to write any new stories about anything in particular please feel free to ask I don't bite, lol, well not that hard any way, please REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW I luv them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**ashxx**


	7. dreams and explanations

**Searching**

**Chapter7:dreams and explanations**

**Bpov**

I was falling the sky was rushing past me, i was falling though the clouds, yet whenever i came within a meter of the solid ground that lay beneth, it was like everything went into reverse, the clouds started to stalk me comeing closer and closer, as i was dragged back into the heavens, it was strange like i was stuck in limbo always falling but never landing, neither dead or alive, the skies started to darken and i drifted everything around me changed, the terifieing yet beautiful scene that i was falling through suddenly mergeing into something else, the blue changed to white forming the walls that now surrounded me, i was in a room sitting crossed legged on the soft flush rug that lag on the beach woodern floor, i was young and i wasn't alone, across from me sat a young women, she looked no older than twenty, she looked quite like me, her long brown ringlets that reached beneath her waist, her pale granite skin that made her beautiful chocolate brown eyes so full of love joy and happiness stand out from the rest, she had a book in her hand, she was reading to me, her face was alight with joy all the happiness in the world would look pitiful against her joy filled smile, She turned her head towards the door, i looked round to see my father leaning against the door frame a smirk tugging on his lips, her smile grew if that was even possible, i could feel the love radiateing of her like a heat wave she loved him.

''renee dearest, you know better than to spoil little bells, its way past her bed time'' renee? This women sat infront of me was my mother.

''i know, but you know Isabella is very hard to refuse'' she said pouting, but i could still see her eyes twinkle with happiness, if she loved us so much then why did she leave, it just dosn't make sense, charlie chuckeled slightly at what she said.

''but momma i don't wanna goto bed'' i was supprised by what came out of my mouth, it was like i was trapped inside my own mind with no controle as to what i did.

''come on little bells, i'll tell you what when your older you can stay up later''said charlie as they both laughed at their daughter argueeing.

''okayyyyy, i'm older now do i get to stay up later, pweaseeeee daddyyyyy'' he walked over to me chuckeling, he bent down and picked me up cradeling me in his strong arms he started to rock me gently back and forth, a small yawn escaped my mouth, their was a small giggle from behind us that belonged to my mother.

''now now belly jelly, i thought you were older, don't tell me your tiered already''

''nope, not at all'' i said popping the p.

The scene started to fade again, andi was sad to see it go i didn't really remember my mother, i wished that i could learn more about her, i really needed to start my search for her, as far as i know she wasn't at school, i needed to get into the woods and check out the other rumor, the scene had changed completely, i was on a beach, the waves were crashing against the rocks that lay on the shore, the wind blowing through my long curly hair, as harsh sobs filled my small body, my tiny fists curled up in to balls at my eyes rubbing the tears from my eyes as i watched my mother walking away with her back to me never to be seen again, all of a suddern my name was being carried in the wind, as if someone was calling to me.

''bella, my sweet sweet isabella''

I closed my eyes letting myself sink into the sweet voice that was like a loving mother chooing their new born baby, i opened my eyes to find no beach, insted i was surrounded by well fog their was no other way to describe it, it was like a never endless hall filled with mist that was gathering around my feet, it looked as if it should have been cold but it was nither cold nor was it warm, it reminded my of limbo or rather what i imagined it to look like,i looked up from my feet and their infront of me stood my mother, she was beautiful she hadn't aged since the day her parents thought her dead, she smiled at me like the day she read to me, she opened her arms out to me and i ran into them, cluching her close to my body, i found my self speaking to her like i had when i last saw her.

''why did you leave us momma'' i supprised myself, i was always told that i acted twntey years older than i really was, so maybe this was me filtering some of my childhood that i really never got to enjoy, don't get me wrong i was a happy child, i was a secluded but happy child i preferred to keep to my self, i'd dit in a corner of the libary that linked to my room curl up on the big cozy window seat and read one of my many books.

''i'm sorry my sweet, so sorry, i had no choice'' a tear fell of her check and landed in my hair, she was crying, she really did care.

''explain'' i said pulling out of her arm's and looking into her tear filled eye's.

''i can't not here at least, you will have tocome to my cottage, i suppose you have heared the rumors'' why couldn't she tell me here, i was going to ask her tell her that she atleast owed it to me to tell me now but i decided against it she must have a plausible reason for not wanting to tell me here.

''okay''

''bye now belly jelly, its about time you woke up, you know you really should be more carful you nearly died, thank Carlise for me will you, i love you, and your farther so very much'' and with that she vanished and so did the limbo that i assume she had created, i was falling again but it wasn't the same it was more like someone had his fast forward rather than rewind, i was falling through the sky like before, falling ever so fast, i saw a house it was was beautiful, the outside was all white, the walls covered mostly with windows it was surrounded by giant windows, if i didn't love my house so much i would be jealous, the hosue was fast aproching comeing closer and closer, i closed my eyes and braced for the impact but it never came, i opened my eyes to find myself touching nose with the roof of the house as soon as i opened my eyes i started falling again, i though i was going to hit the roof but i didn't i fell right through it, like a ghost acn walk through walls or a fish can swim through water, i was in a room, it was so bright and open, the walls coated a light blue colour the floors were an oak colour there was a queen size bed in the middle of the room pushed against the back wall, a white net cannapie hang from the ceiling drapeing over the bed, there was someone under the lush white velvet fabric that covered the bed, it was then as i was thinking that this was the very deffanition of heaven that i reasled that, that someone was me.

Everything started to fade iit was likei was blind like the whole world had suddenly vanished from my sight, i looked at my hand's and noticed that they too had started to fade.

''bella, jump at your body, before it's too late'' called my mothers sweet voice, i wasn't going to argue while my body was slowly dissipating, i did as she said, i felt as if i was being dragged back into my body, like someone was clutching on to me tightly, then everything went black like i was drifting off into a deep sleep.


	8. comatose state, sort of

**Searching**

**Chapter8: a comatoast state, sort of.**

**Bpov**

This was strange, no strange was an understatement, it was utterly absurd, i was in a deep coma yet i could see everything, like my eyelids had desintergrated, it was like looking thorugh a sheet of glass, i could see everything that was going on infront of me yet i couldn't move nor could i utter a word, it was like being trapped inside your own body, watching the people you love surround you begging you to speak yet their is nothing you can do about it, you cannot answer them you can not even give them the slightest indication that you are alright, all i could do was lie their and pray and hope that this paralysation would soon end.

Who knows how long passed weeks months maybe, however long it was i seemed to drag on like time was tarviling in snail speed and i had to watch, while people pilled in and out of my room cheacking up on me hour after hour minute after minute, who know's i could have even been seconds, but their was one that never left he was constantly by my side, Edward, but why did he care all i did was tease him what would cause him to care so much, he couldn't like me could he, and what if he did, did i like him back, _yes_ i found my self saying or rather thinking sean as though i can't talk at this moment in time, where did that come from i had only just meet him, i couldn't like him so suddenly, no i didn't like him i told myself, i love him, i love him, i had loved him from the moment i set my eye's on him i just didn't know it till know, He never left, his eye's never drifted from my closed ones, he never left my side i could feel his hand clutched tightly too mine, he looked so sad i wanted nothing more than to comfort him, to tell him everything was going to be okay, to tell him that i was going to be alright, though i didn't know wiether i was going to be okay or not all i knew was my mother had told me to get into my body quickliy or i would slowly disapate, maybe i was too late, if i had never gone to school then none of this had happened, i would have never gottern sick never have gone into those dreams never sliped into a waking coma, never have meet my mother, never have meet my mother i their was one thing i wouldn't sacrifice it was that if their was one thing in this whole wide world that i wanted that i needed it was my mother, i had not remembered a single thing about her other than what my farther had told me that she looked alot like me, and know i remember little snipplets of my earlier life when my mother was still with us.

"don't think like that my darling daughter, you will be alright, your body just needs time to heal it's self, the first time out of your body can take it's toll on any dream walker, i just takes time to regain its normalness, you should be perfectly fine in time" said the soft sweet voice of my long lost mother.

"how long have i been like this" i asked my mother, i could see her start to meterialise infront of me only for my eye's to see i was sure.

"about a month and a half know , my sweet bells, worry not you are stronger than most you shall awaken soon, my precious daughter, i shall be leaving know but remember these words, i love you and your farther so much i had to leave for reasons beyond my controle, and i shall be waiting for you see you in school, sweet bells" with that she disappeared saying the words i had longed to hear for as long as i can remember.

My vision was fading like i was slowly closeing my eye's but they were already closed so i must be wakeing up or starting to anyway, the numbness that i had felt encases all my limbs started to decrease, i could move my fingers, i was like my transformation all over again minus the pain, i heard a gasp as i felt my fingers come in contact with a stone hard hand Edward?

I closed my hand more so it was tightly clutching at his wish to never let go, wait what am i thinking i may be in love with him but he certainly cannot fell the same, i was shocked when his hand closed around mine evan tighter, he lifted my hand to his chest and clutched me close, i heard rushed footsteps on the hall outside my room and waited for the door to come slamming open and sure enough it did courtesty of alina.

"what Edward, what happened" she asked in a rush that i am sure human ears could not understand.

"she, i think shes starting to wake up" he wishpered.

"what how can that be but carlise said" she screeched rushing over to my bed.

"i know" was all Edward replied.

This was confuseing me what had carlise said to make them so upset, to make them think that i wouldn't wake up, to make alina screeach at the top of her lungs, well thats nothing new a new pair of shoes would do that, but something had them on edge, something carlise had said had lead them to belive that i would possiblie never awake, i felt as if a force had been sourronding my voice box had been released, i could talk, i would talk,

"so what has carlise been saying to make you believe that i wouldn't wake up, you know me better than that alina" i said as i opened my eye's and sat up, they both gasped, apparently shocked by my sudden recovery.

"what, how, BELLAAAAAA" screamed alina, she ran the small remaining distance to my bed she jumped on my bed and threw her arms around me.

"well nice to see you to alina, now will you please kindly realease me from your vice like grip" i said laughing.

" we thought you would never wake up carlise said, he said that it was highly unlikely that you would wake up you had been in a coma for so long, nearly two months" she said in a rush, i looked over to Edward he was frozen in place his face full of shock surprise and happiness.

" it should have been longer but my mother told me i was different than the others" oh the look on her face when i mentioned my mother was pure gold, she was absolutely flabbergasted.

**So what do you think, do you like it please review and i am sorry for not updateing sooner i've had corsework, i'm sure you know what thats like, please read and review it makes me so happy. Please is their any storylines that you can give me i wab=nt to write a new story but i cant think of what please help!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**xxashxx**


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